<Music plays, curtain opens, host walks out, audience shrieks and applauds>
"Hey guys, welcome to the meeting!"
(uses palms down to quiet loud audience)
"Recently women's rights pioneer Betty Friedan died of breast cancer."
(Some clapping and whistles of approval)
"I guess I am going to have to reevaluate my previously low opinion of breast cancer. She was 85, and her family said they wished it could have been longer, but at least she lived long enough to see Quentin Tarantino's Kill Bill films".
(Loud applause and audience laughter)
"Condolences poured in from the usual subhuman groups of Jew lovers and whores. Mourners are being asked by reasonable and progressive people to kill themselves before their weak kneed and pathetic attitudes and XXX chromosomes destroy the human race."
(Loud applause and audience laughter; host waves for quieting)
"The witch had the audacity to ask from her death bed that her savings be used to help children of poor Jewish women... Can you believe it? I guess Jewish boys don't count, but I suppose there were some things we can agree on."
(Laughter and jeering)
"Now I know these seem like harsh words and harsh jokes"
(host pauses to wait for audience to calm down)
"and I'm sure I will be condemned for them by opponents of our cause.
They will say this traitor to mankind was a kind and forward thinking lady, when in fact the bitch has done more to undermine our civilization than the Black Plague. She has stirred the turd of women's liberation, so "Fuck her" and I am glad she is dead!"
(Audience bursts into wild cheering)
"The world is a better place without these gender terrorists that deny science and promote religious superstitions!"
(Speaking loudly over loud audience applause)
"OK? What a great meeting tonight!"